Raccoon City (BFN) – We have received word that the world renowned, Umbrella Corporation is working long and hard on securing a vaccine for COVID-19.
“Obviously we have the experience and resources to combat this strand of the coronavirus and we will do everything in our power to eradicate this virus”, said an Umbrella Corporation spokesperson too BottomFeederNews.
Seems like we can all rest easy knowing that Umbrella Corporation is on the job…
New reports coming from Professor Oak’s Pokémon Talk state that the current coronavirus plaguing the world might have actually originated in Mt. Moon.
It would seem reasonable for COVID-19 to stem from Mt. Moon has the mysterious cave has always been home to Zubat.
Professor Oak recommends trainers stay far away from Mt. Moon and take a break from trying to catch em all.
Unlike our, competitors, friends we’re actually not popular enough to have the game already, but maybe someday.
In the meantime, just get the game – it’s a Pokemon game, you know it’s going to be good.
Which version of the game will you be picking up?
After being released by the Oakland Raiders it didn’t take long for Antonio Brown to land back on his feet. PlayStation just announced, that Mr. Brown will be the new mascot of their beloved Twisted Metal franchise.
Many see this as a good fit as Twisted Metal was formerly represented by Sweet Tooth, another clown.
Rumor suggests Antonio Brown as already received a mysterious letter from an identity simply known as, Calypso.
And it’s the fact that you probably already own the game and all of its DLC content. Well that’s if you’re a sucker like me.
Spider-Man Game Of The Year Edition is available for purchase right now, both in physical and digital format.
Can’t wait for the remastered PlayStation 5 version!
Pallet Town (BFN) – Today President Trump confirmed that his administration had discussed buying the entire Kanto Region from Nintendo.
Rumors of the President looking to purchase Kanto popped up on our radar early last week, but we dismissed them because we figured it was utterly ridiculous. However, speaking to reporters on the S.S. Anne, the President revealed that he indeed asked his administration to look into the possibility of acquiring the Kanto Region.
“It’s just something we’ve talked about,” said President Trump. “Nintendo essentially owns it. We’re very good allies with Nintendo. We’ve protected the Kanto Region during The Great Pokemon War, so the concept came up.”
Nintendo President responded to the President stating, “The Kanto Region is not for sale. It’s not even real.”
Warren MI (BFN) – “It’s just not the same”, lamented William Blake referring to his beloved Pokémon franchise.
“I’ve been a fan of the Pokémon games since Red and Blue, but this latest iteration,” Blake paused, “like I said, it’s just not the same.”
Blake is referring to Pokémon Ultra Sun and Pokémon Ultra Moon. Both of these games implemented a number drastic changes to franchises, such as Z-Power and Z-Moves. As expected some fans enjoyed the changes while others like Blake did not.
However, all is not doom and gloom for the 30 year old man, who maintains a soft spot for his favorite gaming franchise, “that being said, I’m still looking forward to Pokémon Sword and Shield.”
Pokémon Sword and Shield hits stores November 15th for the Nintendo Switch.
Washington (BFN) – White House officials have unveiled to BFN, President Trumps new initiative to tackle the pressing issue of violent video games.
To combat video games and the violent tendencies they seem to instill, tendencies that seem to strictly plague young Caucasian males here in the United States, President Trump plans to erect an “Attack on Titan” type of wall to keep out all video games.
The estimated cost of the wall is said to be around 2 billion VC. Fortunately, the season pass will allow for earlier access of the wall.
Williamsburg Brooklyn (BFN) Folks at Nintendo today unveiled more information regarding the upcoming Pokémon games for the Nintendo Switch. They announced various Galarian forms of Pokémon such as Zigzagoon and its evovolved form Linoone.
The most surpising one seems to be both Koeffing and Weezing getting this treatment. The new forms are gray colour versions of themselves donning mustaches and top hats. They have also gained Fairy as a secondary type.
Nintendo also announced in this new form that their trademark move Smog will be changed to Smug. Not much is known but it is speculated this move will have an air of superiority and may pair well with an IPA beer.
Pokémon Sword and Shield are set to be released this November 15th for the Nintendo Switch.
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